Hell's Kitchen - New Season (9)

Well Gordon...here we go again.

We've got a few new lambs for the slaughter.  Not many stand out from the crowd but as the numbers reduce, we will get to know the contestants better.  I have to say that your staff has been acting rather badly.  Basically Gordon is a nice person and a perfectionist.  He doesn't go out of his way to be mean unless his frustration level has been surpassed.  He has a set of high standards but when it comes down to it, he has a good heart.  So I have to ask...  Why did you employ this guy?

Scott is one hell of a hard worker.  He keeps his standards high but it seems that he holds contempt for the contestants.  His mode of leadership can only be described as ... bullying.  Any breech of protocol is met with this guy yelling at someone within inches of the offending person's face.  Maybe this guy thinks of this as boot camp in the Marines but it seems like he is getting worse over the years.  I seriously think someone needs a hug xD



Elise.  One of the contestants that has achieved mention.  I don't know if it's a superiority complex... an inferiority complex...a super sized ego... all I know is that this princess is an over inflated balloon begging for a prick.  I can't wait to see her pop.  This is the kind of person who wins an arguement by keeping her mouth open the whole time saying how it's someone else's fault.    Ah well.   This IS HK...not Master Chef.

More Later 

Idiot Republicans write blank checks while Democrats have to honor it

I've always wondered if Americans* were generally smart or generally stupid.  Sure...some believe that Canadians all live in igloos and drive around in snow mobiles; or at very least - convince them easily enough...but what is the average level of intelligence?

Well if we can follow the logic that any group of people can be defined by the choices that it has made over the years - lets look at THIS factor:  George Bush made a HUGE mess.  Once this administration was done economically fucking over the country for Right Wing corporate interests, it moved on and left a huge mess for the next administration to clean up.

Believe it or not, I'm neither Left wing nor Right wing.  I don't have a problem with a Right wing that responsibly administers governance favoring corporate development in the interest of creating new jobs.  The problem is...the real world doesn't work like that.  Boss Hogg is still going to pay his employees shit even if he gets a 'Development Grant'.  It's just going to allow him to buy another expensive foreign car.  Throwing money at corporate moguls doesn't 'Trickle down' sufficiently to justify the expense.   The 'Trickle down' theory was another brain wave of ANOTHER one of the US elected Republicans:  Ronald Reagan could look and act like a US President (mainly because he was an ACTOR!!!) but could not BE an effective one.  He got the part...but the only job he ever did was ACT.  

So it looks like Bush's only skill was to write checks as president.  Now the US is at the brink of a FULL ECONOMIC COLLAPSE.  You think the corporations that got 'Grants' are going to stick around?  No man...their main office 'Moved' to Bermuda or something.  They make Billions but don't pay taxes.  Why don't major corporations pay much taxes?  Because if you tax them, they will move to Mexico taking thousands of jobs with them - ruining even more lives in the process.  I have seen facilities built to support industry ... completely funded by the Tax payer (The average American).  Wait...so there is this 'Entity' that we are paying so that it doesn't hurt people?  Hmmm...isn't there a name for that, George 'War on Terrorism' Bush?**  So basically a poorly administrated Republican  party (not all are) make a big sloppy  mess and a more responsible party show up to clean...again! 
When the job is half done, a 'Well Funded' party gets the attention of the general public and fat checks roll out to their corporate cronies...again!  Rinse and Repeat. 

So basically the system is failing. 
There is only ONE GOOD REASON you are NOT up the fucking creek already:

You elected the RIGHT person for the job this last election.  Even still Republican partisan politics continue to dominate and bog down proactive efforts to resolve this crisis. Even onto the 12th hour your fat little Republican piggies are splashing around in the mud looking for scraps and leverage.   Barack Obama is one of the top 5 Best presidents you have ever had.    I'm proud of him...AND I'M CANADIAN!!!  This is a man who is purely committed to all of the American people and not just his corporate buddies (like the Republicans are).  Even in the heat of this crisis, this man has retained his grace, dignity, ability to think straight and even his sense of humor (Holy Shit!). 

Oh...and I figured out who the Anti-Christ is:

Well of course she's a fucking lawyer.  Ann Coulter...AC...Anti-Christ.

That's fucking scary.  Think about it - this woman makes a fortune from hatred and controversy.   She even calls herself a 'Christian'...though she doesn't attend any specific church - probably because she would burst into flames and show her true form.

*Technically that title could go to anyone living in the 'Americas'...which is literally 2 continents worth of countries.


**I've talked about this before.  'Terrorism' is a concept that endures because it works.  A form of it exists in schools...in corporations...in everyday politics...in the courtrooms...on the streets.  In order to end it, you must change people and/or their circumstances...and as immense as that body of work would be...I'm not sure that wouldn't have negative complications as well.  Only a complete idiot thinks he could end 'Terrorism' with military ordinance:

Palestine uses terrorism because they are pissed off and want their land back (and rightly so).  I know that's not a popular opinion.  I'm not Anti-Semitic...being partly Jewish myself.  Someone needs to acknowledge what Israel and the US did was wrong...but that's a rant for another day.

Deus Ex: Invisible War **Spoilers **Spoilers **Spoilers

There are a few characters in IW that deserve a little looking into.

Chad Dumier

 

In Deus Ex

 

In Invisible War (taking place 20 years after DX1)

In average human terms, Chad is a total douche.  Both Paul Denton and JC saved his ass in DX1 at least twice.  Paul D was a good friend to Chad.  Now, 20 years later, Chad wants you to kill them both because their political agenda is different than his.  Chad's Elite troopers will emit a deadly gas cloud that kills everyone in the area indiscriminately if those troopers die.   Chad has manipulated and lied to 100's of millions of people in order to gain control over them.  Chad attempted to coerce you to kill someone by holding one of your classmates hostage with the threat that she would be killed if you didn't follow orders.  After you rescue her, he tells you that he wouldn't have gone through with it saying 'What kind of person do you think I am, anyway?'...Yes...he's French. 

To understand Chad...He's a good person who does bad things to get a good result.  Most people would judge him by his actions...as you would judge anyone by their actions.  To understand his group 'The Illuminati' is to understand the burden of pure leadership for the common good.  To shoot a good person is an evil thing...but to do this for a result that would substantially alter the course of the future of mankind for the better?  This isn't a decision most of us would want to make.  Paul and JC are heroes yet they have massive PR problems.  The media is slaughtering them...spinning everything they did into the worst possible interpretation.   Why?  Chad is sure that the idea they have is a preposterous one that will end up turning everyone on earth into some version of an insane cyborg.  Chad is in control of the Illuminati which, in turn, controls the media.  I'm sure Chad personally likes both Paul and JC but since he can't change their minds, 'knowing' (by his estimation) what they are planning will hurt society, he must kill them.  That isn't the kind of decision I would ever want to make but one that a leader on the scope of the Illuminati would have to. 

Lin-May Chen

Ah...Lin-May.  Perhaps the first reason to not take 'The Order' seriously.  'The Order' attempted to rescue you by way of shooting you in the face at the Tarsus Academy.  It turns out that the 'Captain' in charge of the mission wasn't following orders precisely.  You meet Lin-May at the Holo (a sort of full body visual telephone) just as you are about to exit Tarsus.  She tells you not to trust the WTO (a sort of world wide commercial army for peace and order) and to come see her right away.  If you spend more than a few minutes in Upper Seattle, she will tell you to 'get out of there...the WTO could arrest you at any moment'.  Right off the bat you feel seriously manipulated by 'The Order'.  They openly preach peace and wellness but all Lin-May ever tells you to do is to kill people.  Fortunately you can get through the game almost completely ignoring 'The Order'.   If you do something that Lin-May doesn't like, she will send a couple of 'Seekers' (peace loving, brain washed flower childs)  after you with guns.  Killing these 'Tards quickly, she tells you to smarten up or she will send 'more' after you.  Essentially 'The Order' needed a pit-bull and Lin-May was it.   She is essentially a religeous zealot that does, or orders, whatever 'The Order' needs to further its objectives.

  Somewhere in the game between being 'ordered' to kill another person (Yeah I'll get right on that) and having Lin's seekers trying to kill me I thought 'Man...this woman is a draconian bitch'.  Then I thought 'Chen?'...'Max Chen?'...'could this woman be the daughter of Max Chen and Maggie Chow?'.  It turns out she was.  Figures.  She must have gotten her gullibility from Max and her ruthless draconian manner from Maggie.  Later in the game you have the golden opportunity to inform this bitch that she was lied to and used.  'The Order' was just another tool for the Illuminati... and that the scriptures were just a well designed psychological doctrine which was used to control people. 

Retro Review - Deus Ex: Invisible War

The New Deus Ex: Human Revolution is out and I'm going to need some solid time to sit down and enjoy this game.  I enjoyed and played the crap out of the original Deus Ex, but was dissuaded from playing the second in the series because I heard it wasn't very good.  Years later I Youtube'd the gameplay which didn't look too bad and bought it off of STEAM for like 6 bucks and change.    

Invisible War came out in 2003.  The graphics are ... not terrible for the time.  Unfortunately, people of the future can't turn their heads or move their eyes so they have to turn their entire bodies to look at something...it's really quite funny when you notice it.  There really is only 2 more things to complain about for this game;  The zone boundaries are short and the loading times between them are long.  You have to cross many boundaries to accomplish certain objectives and then go all the way back to turn them in.  The levels are cluttered and confusing.  The game crashes enough to be a little distracting and can compromise the integrity of a saved game so that you literally lose all your progress. 

What did I like more about Deus Ex?  Space.  Invisible war is constantly crowded and cramped.  I miss the open spaces.  Hanging around Hong Kong at the top of a building while Blade Runneresk music plays on the ambient background.  I miss the skill point system that you could use to customize you character to unique specifications.

What was good about Invisible war?  So many things, actually:

The dialogue was engaged and intellectually stimulating.   The story was intricate and linked back to characters from the first.  (The irony of being told one of the few truths by a character who's voice actor was the same as Walton Simons - 2IC Villain from the first - did not escape my attention).  The Biomods didn't make you a superman...you still had to fight smart.  Simplification of resources with multi-tools and 'Ammo' as a generic commodity.  The voice acting was generally better than the first *.    The intentional music was way better in IW.  The ambient music was less in your face with Invisible War but I do miss some points from the original score (Blade Runner ambience).   The combat system encourages a player to fight smart **.   The newer universal ammo system means that you can use whatever weapon you like.  The weapons have an 'Alt Fire' ability that makes them even more fun than before.  There are even 'unique weapons' hanging around here and there.  Different custom mods to weapons can be used to appeal to different play styles.

The Deus Ex series is an innovation of both story and gameplay.  How the game ends is based on what you as the main protagonist chooses to do.  You start off not knowing what is going on and end the game shaping the future.  Deus Ex: The Invisible War isn't bad.  This is a 2003 game I would give a 8.5/10  

Definately worth the $6 and change!

*Laura Bailey was amazing (Though I played Fallout New Vegas before this so it was odd running through a game with a character sounding like Lieutenant Boyd).   Not to say that most of the voice actors weren't top notch in the first but a chain is only as strong as its weakest link. Maxence Tillitette never had a voice acting part before or after the original Deus Ex. He had one good voice and the other sounded like he just woke up after a drunk and someone thrust a script in front of him and said 'Read This'. 

**You are as 'bullet proof' at the end of the game as you were at the start. That means that you have to play smart. During one battle where I was surrounded by Templars (purity extremists) in a hanger with a massive military bot. I ran and hit cloaking (both visual and IR) and threw a scrambler grenade at the bot before ducking under cover. Their formerly loyal bot wiped out the Templars and I 'EMP droned' the milbot from my hiding place. In the first Deus Ex..you didn't need to play that smart. You could power up your Ballistic Armor, your Ballistic protection implants, Aggressive Defense and Rambo the room...but really?  Doing that just isn't as fun.

The Step Mother-in-law from hell

On some level of hell must go a sect of people with whom nothing is ever really good enough for.  Their level of tolerance is as thin as a layer of saran wrap, yet as flexible as a sheet of glass.  There is a reason why campy Sci-Fi puts a Nazi uniform on individuals with 'Upper English'  accents.      

Recently there is what was (supposed to be) a private email which was written by Carolyn, the woman pictured below, to her future Step-daughter-in-law.  The letter went viral.  The letter, completely oblivious to its own delivery of rudeness, chastises the D I L for being rude in the most minor of social infractions (according to Carolyn's high standards for other people).  

Carolyn: The Step MIL from HELL

The Letter in question 

  There has been a lot of discussion online about this one.  Let's  break it down, shall we?

It is high time someone explained to you about good manners. Yours are obvious by their absence and I feel sorry for you.
Those are some strong words of disappointment.  Heidi must have shown up picking her nose and smashing beer cans against her forehead while belching in the faces of the other guests.  Well lets read WHAT Carolyn had a problem with (oh man...it must be pretty bad)


When you are a guest in another’s house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat – unless you are positively allergic to something.
 Okay.  So she didn't eat it, and threw it at the maid and stomped around the table in a chant protesting - no?  There was just food that she didn't want to eat.  Okay.  What else did you have a problem with, Carolyn?


When a guest in another’s house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early – you fall in line with house norms.
So she slept in. Maybe a bugle would be in order. You should get her to polish her shoes and press her dress and stand at attention in the drive-way at dawn while you inspect her before getting her to run 10 miles with a 75 lb pack.


You do not remark that you do not have enough food
Maybe she didn't know there was to be 7 more courses finishing off with an ample serving of quiet British contempt.


You do not start before everyone else.
 Well it seems to me that SOMEONE is going to start eating first.  Given that the person in question is a Diabetic, and that managing her blood sugar level is a question of life or a horrible death or loss of bodily functions, I'd say 'Give her a fucking pass'.


You do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your host.
(oh...this is too funny) Please Sir! Can I have some more?


I am being kept awake – or woken early – by Bomber who is so profoundly upset by your behaviour on your recent visit that he is depressed and anxious.
(Bomber is the dog) YES!  The dog was very upset that she used the dessert fork for the main course.  The DOG is traumatized that SHE SLEPT IN.  The DOG needs to see a psychiatrist because Heidi took another helping of DINNER!!!   OOOOOOO Kay!

Or are you saying that Heidi 'Made you feel' so upset that the dog was reflecting your own emotional distress?  Interesting.  Carolyn; no one can 'Make you feel' anything.   You clearly over-reacted and drove your own emotions into a tizzy. 


Unfortunately for Freddie, he has fallen in love with you and Freddie being Freddie, I gather it is not easy to reason with him or yet encourage him to consider how he might be able to help you.  
It may just be possible to get through to you though. I do hope so. Your behaviour on your visit to Devon during April was staggering in its uncouthness and lack of grace.  
 I Think Carolyn has delusions of being the Queen.  What kind of flowers do you grow, exactly?

You should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughter.
Carolyn; The thing about an insult is that it's not exactly true.  Judging from what you said, I very much doubt Heidi would have to resort to fiction to retrieve something unflattering about the family.   


I have no idea whether you wrote to thank Georgia for the weekend but you should have hand-written a card to her.
Yes...and have that dispatched on the quickest horse in the stables!


You should have hand-written a card to me. You have never written to thank me when you have stayed at Houndspool.
Dear Carolyn, I found your quiet contempt most endearing.  It was only a couple of days with you but it really seemed like years.  Thanks for having me over.   I really want to do that again soon.

 
Georgia has quite the most exquisite manners of anyone I have ever come across. You would do well to follow her example.
Georgia will be heading to the sanitarium soon.  Please write her a 'get well' card.  BTW.  She finally farted and took out half of  Devon.


Unfortunately, this was not the first example of bad manners I have experienced from you. If you want to be accepted by the wider Bourne family I suggest you take some guidance from experts with utmost haste.  
Yes...I am a woman and I want me and my offspring to have the last name of WIDER-BOURNE.  I want a life so critical and un-fun that I can, in turn, be critical of other people as is outlined in the `broomstick up the ass` manifesto.   


You regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself why.
It is tragic that you have diabetes. However, you aren’t the only young person in the world who is a diabetic.  
Yeah!  Get over it!  Sheesh...you`d think it was some kind of life threatening disease or something! 


I know quite a few young people who have this condition, one of whom is getting married in June. I have never heard her discuss her condition.
Probably because she doesn`t trust you...go figure


She quietly gets on with it. She doesn’t like being diabetic. Who would? You do not need to regale everyone with the details of your condition or use it as an excuse to draw attention to yourself. It is vulgar.
Oh for God Sake!  Just shut up and die in a very British way.  No one has to know that you have a disease (and by knowing could potentially save your life).  It`s more important to not say anything and, at least not call attention to yourself.  

There are plenty of finishing schools around. You would be an ideal candidate for the Ladette to Lady television series. Please, for your own good, for Freddie’s sake and for your future involvement with the Bourne family, do something as soon as possible.
Yes...RUN!!!

As a diabetic of long standing you must be acutely aware of the need to prepare yourself for extraordinary eventualities, the walk to Mothecombe beach being an example. You are experienced enough to have prepared yourself appropriately.
Yes!  You can only eat when we tell you it`s okay to eat so for GOD`s SAKE...if you know we are going to the beach, digest your food slower!

No one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity style behaviour.
Fun!? What is this word...`Fun`? 
 

I understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters’ marriages.)  
Her dad ran an agency supplying nurses to care homes...the business recently went under.   Thanks for rubbing that in.   How polite of you to mention it.



If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes. 
Carolyn...you grow flowers.  You are not 'The Queen'.  You are the Queen of Spades though. 



One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddie.
He repairs bikes and she`s a PA.  Lets look at the couple:

Freddie...you are one lucky Son of a bitch (or is that `Step` son)

In Conclusion;  Carolyn...you need to have a long, hard talk with Bomber.   I think he will tell you that your expectations are too linear in an ever evolving world of cultural tolerances.   Your Broom-up-ass viewpoint limits the potential of your own human experience.

As well...stop snorting your damn flowers  (Ruff!!)